How are you?
How are you feeling?
What are you feeling?
How do you respond to this question? For me, the answer is always “fine” or “I don’t know.”
It’s not because I am trying to be difficult or because I’m avoiding the question, but because I genuinely don’t know. For the vast majority of the time I am filled with emptiness – I feel blank. Sometimes there are other, secondary emotion words I can pinpoint but it’s usually just nothing.
This is a short post without a conclusion, but I’m not feeling feelings properly…and I’m trying to wrap my head around it.
MBC
/ December 27, 2012I have scripted responses to the questions you mentioned. Just my outer shell giving the reply that people want to hear. Don’t believe I have the correct frame of reference to answer them truthfully.
anxietyadventures
/ December 28, 2012I think that’s why I usually just say “fine” – it’s easier than trying to think about it.
Lunch Sketch
/ December 28, 2012This is true for me too lately and I have been giving it a lot of thought. The color wheel is a useful way to look at emotions. For me, those feelings in the middle two circles are extremely rare, even at times when they should be my natural response.
daylily2011
/ December 28, 2012Oh, I know what you and lunch mean. I thought I had more emotions that I can express appropriately but in truth I’m pretty shut down except for that outer circle, too. I may just copy that diagram and bring it to therapy. But just thinking about expressing disgust or ecstasy in a social setting puts me in an uncomfortable place. No thanks, I’m pretty comfortable to stay right where I am.
anxietyadventures
/ December 28, 2012I can pretty much only identify the outer circle, as well.
Daylily, uncomfortable is a great word to use – I haven’t considered the idea of discomfort about expressing these emotions in public, but that’s is absolutely part of it.
I think I’m equating expressing emotions with not being in control of them, so I’d prefer to not express any emotion…and perhaps that’s led to not feeling them? I don’t know. More to think about.
Lunchsketch, let me know if you reach any conclusions with your ponderings!
Joyce
/ May 20, 2013I’ve never thought of it that way before – not expressing emotions to have control over them.
maddsuspicions
/ December 29, 2012Hi, I understand what you mean, a lot of the time I feel very similar. Similarly with dreams, I don’t have them very much now as much as I used to have them, all the best
Nicole
/ December 29, 2012I like this diagram alot–I tend to do the “fine” thing because I’m not quite sure how to address what I”m feeling. Thanks for sharing!
Joyce
/ May 20, 2013Reblogged this on MAKE BPD STIGMA-FREE!.